Quotes/Stories/Updates.
Entirely too stubborn.
Nerdy.
Already set in a career I can work the rest of my life.

That career is Law Enforcement.
I am a cop.

I'll give advice on anything I know a thing about so don't hesitate to ask.

 

You guys… this week has been miserable. I have stories.

So, first, a guy “crashed” his car in a puddle. This puddle also happened to be the runoff from a farm field. Do you know what they put ON that farm field? Sewage. Liquid cow shit. That liquid cow shit ran off into this probably 5’ wide, 100’ long, 2+’ deep puddle. And the vehicle is up to the floor boards in water.

Alright. Now, that vehicle is fogged up so bad I can’t see if the driver is dead or alive and the tires are spinning in the puddle like he’s still pushing the gas. (Usually a good sign someone is unconscious/dead/not normal). I run down the hill… and around the puddle because I care but it stinks  and it was like 1 hour into a 12 hour shift. He was not dead… or injured… just OH SO VERY drunk.

"So, uh, what happened?"
"I reached for a cigarette and…"
"Ah, well can you put the vehicle in park for me real quick."
Fumble fumble fuck around. Finally gets it in park.
"We’re gonna try to get you out of the vehicle right away."
"I don’t have any shoes on."
"Why?"
"I was going to [town like 60 miles away.]"
"Okay, well you still have to get out."

So, then he proceeds to get out and I’m trying to help while also not falling in the puddle of LIQUID SEWAGE. He decides he NEEDS his jacket and turns around, stepping nearly waist deep in the puddle.

I wanted to nope the fuck outta there. Instead, I dragged him out and put him in my squad. :(

Thank you to all you nerds who joined me in the live chat last night!!

We will have to do it again sometime.
If you like this post, I will make sure that you get a private message to let you know when I will do another live chat.

Join Me - Live Chat

heyladycop:

heyladycop:

heyladycop:

Just click it. Change the nickname and say hi!

There’s sonatie, dustedfingerprints, mclaughlane, splinterslikerain… all in the SAME ROOM TALKING! Join us.

Add melon and Sheepdog556 up in here gossiping about snow and hiring processes. Jump in here if you want some!

You guys… I posted the link. Join my chat.

Shannon made a cameo already. It’s like celebrity tumblr appearances.

Live chat about 6pm Pacific 8pm Central 9pm Eastern.

Will post link here when I open it.

For when I post it: It is just a web based chat room. Nothing to download. You only have to type in a nickname and you can join. Don’t have to make an account or remember a password. Just make it up and if no one else is using the nickname, you’re set. Super simple. I will try to be HeyLadyCop in it.

Also, for curiosity sake, if I opened up an open, no login, live IRC chat for a couple hours tonight (or scheduled one for the future) would any of you be interested?

I think it might be fun to get some of my followers in a chat and just shoot the shit. Yall seem cool and might even like each other.

I have to get ready for work and they were predicting 4-8 inches of snow during my 4 days this week.

If you wanna see motivation die, put snow on it in mid-April.

Haha oh nooo, those evil things. I remember competing with friends to see who could stand a mouthful of those, way back in middle school. Pretty sure they made my tongue bleed!

The torture has escalated to as many pushups or situps as I can do while they maintain flavor. Somewhere in the 20’s for each, which tells me these things really really don’t last.

Also, my tongue may totally be bleeding but I HAVE TO stay awake another 4-5 hours. If you want to live chat for the next couple hours, This Link (missed that ship) should get you to me. (No account or anything required, just click and make up a nickname.)

jesus christ i havent had a warhead in years but my tongue just immediately puckered up

That is exactly what motivated me to try some again. I was generous with 30 seconds… It’s probably only 5 good seconds.

I’m torturing myself with warheads… Who does this!? These are the devil’s candy. Good for 30 seconds and then just stabbing me and making my tongue raw. Dumbest idea ever.